http://wiki.keithl.com/InBetween ==== The In Between ==== == Unforgettable Encounters During Life's Final Moments == == Hadley Vlahos RN 2023 West Slope Lib. 616.029 VLAHOS == ------ [[ https://www.self.com/story/hadley-vlahos-interview | Vlahos interview, 31yo 2023/12/12 ]] .pVIII Episcopalian Baton Rouge, parents funeral directors and licensed embalmers in Baton Rouge .pIX age 10 moved to [[ https://www.google.com/maps/place/Destin,+FL+32541/@30.3962396,-86.569968,12z/data=!4m6!3m5!1s0x88914379c940f4b7:0x17a48bdb46584c32!8m2!3d30.3935337!4d-86.4957833!16zL20vMHJwOHg?entry=ttu&g_ep=EgoyMDI1MDIxMi4wIKXMDSoASAFQAw%3D%3D | Destin FL ]] .pXI high school friend [[ http://taylorhaugen.org | Taylor Haugen ]] dies of football game injury .pXII Florida State University, "party school" .pXIII pregnant at 19, summer before sophomore year .pXIV Son Brodie 2012/12/24 .pXIV nursing degree 2015?, immediate care nurse, then nursing home, then hospice ca. 2017 ----- .p003 Ch1: Glenda (2016?) .p007 Glenda talking to deceased sister .p008 Continuous care (hospice nurse 24h) .p009 "she isn't hallucinating, she is crossing over" .p011 "My daughter thinks I'm crazy" .p019 Glenda comatose .p021 Time of death 8:42am - chandelier burns out with a pop ----- .p022 Ch2: Carl (2017?) congestive heart failure, in his 80s .p023 wife Mary pediatric nurse .p026 Hadley mentions '''boyfriend Chris''', physical therapist, Greek/Japanese heritage .p029 patient Ms. Morgan connives visit to Chris with Hadley .p030 Carl tells Hadley about Usain Bolt .p032 Carl out of bed, playing hide and seek with 2yo daughter Anna, who drowned years ago .p035 '''the surge''' of energy everyone gets before they die .p038 Carl time of death 4:47am ----- .p041 Ch3: Sue .p045 Ms. Sue reels off information for chart .p046 "can you fold laundry worth shit?" .p048 Wheezing, pulseox 87% "not too bad" .p049 taught "always treat" ... except hospice .p055 stale bread, Sue Great Depression, never wasted food .p056 flashback to learning of pregnancy .p059 in church Father Tom skips sermon, says God told him to say "You need to give up your ideal life ... and have this baby. .p062 Sue reconnects with best friend of long ago .p065 Father Tom arrives, prays with Sue and Hadley .p068 Sue dies, Hadley not called because "Dad told Sue that Hadley couldn't handle it" .p069 Hadley mentioned in obituary, only happened twice more ----- .p070 Ch4: Sandra .p071 Sandra 50yo female with breast cancer, chemotherapy, metastases ... Tesla ... husband George .p075 Flashback: Chris' mother Babette with glioblastoma, age 55 .p079 Flashback: Nurse is Theresa, who trained Hadley ... and now seemed uncaring .p085 Sandra's daughter arrives at door - Hadley "Come here right now!", holds Sandra's hand while she took last breath ----- .p087 Ch5: Elizabeth 40yo nonsmoker with lung cancer, used to teach yoga .p090 Flashback; anorexia, Teacher Ms. Lopez helps with sun while Hadley studies .p097 Elizabeth also was anorexic, says "Eat the cake" .p099 Hadley eats Christmas cheesecake ----- .p106 Ch6: Edith (husband John) .p108 Alzheimer's levels: 5 Moderate Dementia, 6 Moderately Severe, 7 Severe (no words) .p117 "She thinks the bedroom is on fire" .p126 [[ https://www.healthline.com/health/stages-of-pressure-ulcers | pressure ulcer ]] from not being turned. .p127 actually [[ https://compassioncrossing.info/kennedy-ulcers-understanding-identification-care-and-significance-in-the-end-of-life/ | Kennedy ulcer ]] skin organ shutting down .p132 bedroom caught on fire a few months later ----- .p134 Ch7: Reggie .p136 Hadley's father says a real nurse saves lives .p138 Reggie 58yo with end-stage liver disease (alcohol) .p141 partner Lisa .p141 Reggie [[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ascites | ascites ]] "bloated stomach" (fluid in abdomen), sign of liver cancer .p146 ''Chris proposes to Hadley'' .p150 Regie says it is 1977, and he is in [[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mexia,_Texas | Mexia, Texas ]] with his parents and Grandmother .p158 Hadley learns that Lisa suicided after she left ----- .p160 Ch8: Lily .p162 Therapist: "You didn't have a healthy example of how to have a disagreement within a romantic relationship, right?" .p163 Therapist next session: "We're going to discuss the suicide today" .p164 two nurses unexpected leave .p172 Allison brought dying friend Lily south from Georgia, last trip to condo on beach. .p172 Allison opens balcony for ocean breeze, puts bowl of beach sand under Lily's feet. "Lil - you made it to the beach" .p173 Hadley calls old friend "Will you be my bridesmaid?" Hannah "Of course!" ----- .p174 Ch9: Babette .p176 Chooses 3 months to wedding (typical planning takes a ''year???'') .p177 Babette chooses mother-son dance song [[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnQ8N1KacJc | "Good Riddance" by Green Day ]] .p180 Babette's 16yo terrier Holly suddenly sick, vet euthanizes dog, cremated .p181 On beach with her family, Babette flings ashes into wind, ashes blow all over family .p182 Babette: "Holly will always be in our hearts." Chris: "Yeah, and in our lungs." .p182 [[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category_5_hurricane | Category Five ]] [[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hurricane_Michael | Hurricane Michael ]] evacuate to Mississippi, return for patients . [[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Columbus_Day_storm_of_1962| 1962 Columbus Day Storm ]][[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saffir%E2%80%93Simpson_scale#Category_3 | Category 3-equivalent 115mph 948 millibars ]] .p184 landfall [[ https://www.google.com/maps/place/Mexico+Beach,+FL+32456/@29.7894642,-86.3473924,9z/data=!4m6!3m5!1s0x889497c51c040927:0x12dfe414858b6e1c!8m2!3d29.9479833!4d-85.4179766!16zL20vMHJoZmY?hl=en&entry=ttu&g_ep=EgoyMDI1MDIxMi4wIKXMDSoASAFQAw%3D%3D | Mexico Beach ]] 70 miles WSW .p186 Babette to hospital, Divert to Fort Walton Beach Medical Center 12 Mi northwest .p188 Chris is there, youngest son calls in, Babette passes, Hadley felt like failure for harsh surroundings not as planned ----- .p191 Ch10: Albert .p196-199 angry memories of judgmental medical office workers during Hadley's pregnancy .p199 Homeless patient under ''East Creek Bridge?'' .p201 Al diabetic, infected foot .p220 Al sees mother .p222 Delayed, accident on road ahead (could have been her, she thinks) .p224 Al had bad feeling about Hadley in car wreck (I suppose a Hadley is needed to connect these dots ...) ----- .p225 Ch11: Frank .p226 new assignment, hospice consultations (explaining hospice to patients0 .p227 patient Frank and (wife?) Cheryl .p228 just under 65, no medicare .p230 head and neck cancer .p232 Frank: "maybe you could write a book someday" .p235 re visitations: "We'll find out for ourselves one day" .p237 Will: "She (mother) died alone. This is my way of making things right: not letting anyone else die alone" .p238 "only one of every four hospice nurses makes it beyond five years, from what I've heard." . my guess: probably half don't make it beyond the first paycheck, so it's one of two at five years. ----- .p239 Ch12: Adam .p239 "I'm not caring for brain cancer patients" vow after Babette .p240 Patient Adam in emergency room six, same as Babette .p246 Officious nursing floor manager thwarted .p246 wife Jillan gets in bed with Adam, sang [[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aplWTXEcY70 | "Hallelujah" ]] .p247 Chris regards Babette's not-at-home death; he was present because "everything happens for a reason" ----- .p249 Conclusion .p249 the people who are happiest at the end of their life are those who have achieved a sense of peace in regard to how they've lived, and ... comfortable ... about what comes next .p249 "everyone dies the same way"