= Presto =
== How I Made Over 100 Pounds Disappear and Other Magical Tales ==
=== Jillette, Penn Bvtn 921 JILLETTE, PENN 2016 ===
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 . 330 lbs, systolic 200
 . Ray Cronise !CrayRay
 . 2 weeks of potatos and water, slowly reintroducing other foods
  .Ray Crow NICE
 .xvi making dangerous-looking events safe is my job.
 .003 2014 ''Director's Cut'' movie in 2014, still no distribution (2017/02)
 .004 2012 ''Celebrity Apprentice'', said DT's hair looks like cotton candy made out of piss
  . DT at very best the worst person who ever lived
  . PJ lost because he was rude, lost $250K for Opportunity Village, but others on show wrote personal checks
  . Vanilla/Chocolate Magic Swirtle
 .012 90% blockage of heart widowmaker, stent, bp still 220
 .016 6'7" 322lb (BMI 36.3) Lose 70lb or stomach sleeve in 6 months, off meds at 230lb
 .021 life-or-death imperative to go crazy.
 .022 down to 304 in five weeks
 .025 Weds November 26 2014 Crayray  27 flights of stairs per Oreo
 .028 We keep storing fat for a winter that never comes
 .039 Michael Goudeau - magic and Adult tricycles
 .055 But if the paleo diet is really that good for you, how come the Flintstones need multivitamins?
 .055 three of clubs is their force card
 .060 just not eat butter and stay away from ''Chomulungma'' (?? Nepali for Mt. Everest, restaurant in Australia ?? )
 .066 '''S A D''' Standard American Diet ... potato diet, any kind, with skins and water, pepper OK but no salt 
 .068 ... watching ''Black Mirror'' (TV show) ... Norman Mailer's ''The Executioner's Song'' (1979 Gary Gilmore)
 .069 Bacon !MovieNight
 .071 P&T script is about a hundred pages of dialog, parts of show are flowcharted.  Red Ball, Silverfish tricks.  Lightheaded.
 .074 Contrast showers on day six, 10 seconds warm shower, 20 seconds cold, 10 reps, then cold as long as tolerable
 .077 Tim Minchin . . . Ryan Bell . . . Garfinkle and Oates
 .080 "L.A. Troops" Richie Nathanson, Dino Cameron, Andy Lerner (writers)
 .085 Day 14 pulse hit 38, BP 132/64, doctor dropped 2 blood pressure meds, start of ''corn''
 .087 less urgent urination  088 dry desert "Vegas throat"  
 .091 ''corn''  Goudeau giggles a  lot
 .095 Novel "Sock"  096 bell peppers have a shitty attitude, but PJ will eat them now
 .103 now liver uses body fat for glycogen rather than food
 .107 hard to care about the food he eats, giving up on the "I don't give a fuck" personality
 .108 used to get great food by asking for "whatever is going bad", chefs make extra effort.  Now calls ahead with specifics
 .111 gifts on new years day
 .115 there's always the option of eating nothing
 .122 "organic" and "no GMO" bullshit, but that's the type of vinegar and other foods available ... Uncle John's Band
 .126 ''Titanic'' exhibit, goes performance art on EZ-shussing stranger
 .128 Fuck protein, body makes most of it, only ''plants'' make all of them
 .132 (Chick comics) you should eat ugly Christian propaganda that you find on dirty urinals, I'm here to help.
 .133 "too much protein can age you"
 .142 Meditation and Sam Harris, mindfulness and meditation. Headspace.com instead
 .144 Stopped Advil for arthritis in thumbs. 
 .148 after-show longer than show, signs breasts, skips over attractive ones to keep them around longer
 .150 Two happiest days in a man's life: when he buys his boat and when he sells his boat.  CPAP like that
 .156 ''Penn's Sunday School'' podcast with Matt Donnelly  and Goudeau
 .157 Dr. Joel Fuhrman ''End of Dieting'' (Fuhrburger ... "by end of book" )
 .158 be a nut (Dylan), not a weasel (Hillary)
 .159 e-mail from Teller about light-headedness, missing audience members' names and "going up" on lines
 .163 Rare and Appropriate
 .164 !CrayRay high calorie wholesome food 1xWeek, no weight gain, two Oreos per day, weight gain.  rare binge OK, chronic bad
 .166 March 5, 2015 60th birthday, from losing to maintenance, first R&A, "it was just food ... no big deal", not sick afterwards
   . Diana Ross
 .174  Mac King (magician), "unethical vegan", picks off the bacon bits
 .176 kinda sorta worked for Donald Trump when he kinda sorta owned an Atlantic City casino (which DT bankrupted).
 .177 so easy to go back to Fuhrburger diet
 .179 heart screwed up by animal fat gut microbe excrement
 .180 NRBQ greatest band in the world
 .181 birthday party at Erika Larsen's Brookledge, Piff the Magic Dragon and Billy the Mime Chef Jet Tila suggested Taji Marie
  . noted Positively 4th Street song, Eddie Gorodetsky (writer) 
 . 10 pages of food descriptions, Jackfruit tacos with avocado cream. etc.
 .214 Don't exercise: New York Times Seven Minute Workout every other day, 8 minutes of slow-mo weights on mondays
 .227 Lake Tahoe 6224 ft altitude sickness in past, ''Director's Cut'' at Sundance Park City 7K ft
 .232 "Fuhrburger" partly bug-nutty (vaccine, cancer, etc) but PG and EZ eat Fuhrburger nutritarian
 .239 ... stupid hippies killed nuclear power ... electric car, don't need the tax breaks, but a few less government bucks for war
 .242 lost hair (minoxidil for BP also reduces hair loss)
 .245 whole plants - eat every part that's edible.  No bread, no oil (vegetables sautéed in water or broth), no sugar, no cheese.
  . Lots of blueberries, nutritional yeast, mushrooms, tabasco, apple cider vinegar, a few nuts.
 .264 take a lot of pictures, 50% of young people sexting pictures, someday the norm
 .266 Steve Martin play ''Picasso at the Lapin Agile''
 .278 Christopher Hitchens, everyone is an atheist about almost all gods, full atheists just go one god further.
  . Bob Dylan, to live outside the law, you must be honest.
 .292 !CrayRay and Fuhrburger, if you are hungry for a specific food, it's not hunger, it's a craving.
  . evolution keeps you clear and energetic to find food when you need it
 .293 diet "fed window", first meal before show at 5:30pm, last meal midnight, 22 hour fast once a week
  . Dr. Michael Klaper
 .306 Bob and Ray's perfect "The Komodo Dragon"

==== From here on, mostly random essays, mostly amusing ====

 .311 MILF Mother I'd Like to Fuck LtF,  "nighttime prayer" thinking about how to do better
 .316 Krazy Kramer "old fucking hippie" in West Palm Beach (both hate the fucking Dead)
 .321 TSA "the insolence of office"
 .334 If you've got enough money to get fat, you've got enough money to get thin
 .337 The best idea I ever had was asking the smart girls in my high school class to fuck.  
  . second best hot-chocko-berries, blueberries and blackberries, cayenne pepper
   . Fuhrburger bitter cocoa powder ($12/ 5oz) ... note, Hershey's Natural about the same, $2.70/ 8 ounce, 7x cheaper
 .322 pears inconsistent